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September 02 Self evaluationThis is how I had described myself in Year 2009:
I’m more mature, understanding and close to reality. Like my post in year 2007 I’m no more in rush for anything. Now I rather love to wait and let things takes its own course. I feel that I have nothing to prove to people and world. I’m more in peace now and I believe in forget and forgive. Lots of people who left me in past, (friends and family) finally returned to my life and I personally welcome them as like nothing ever had happened. Now I’m realizing their presence more then before. May be that’s why I cheers their presence in my life.
As I grow young so do my parents are turning old and I can sense their insecurity when they don’t find us around them. Like my dream it’s my responsibility to payback in my own small ways, for what they did for me all these years. And trust me I enjoy same way as they had enjoyed when they bought me my first toy car or first video games.
Being singular was not a problem before but now some how I feel that I need a nice companion [:)] yeah it’s different but nice feeling. I hope soon we will find each other for rest of our life. I thank you all for being their in my life I thank god for being so kind. You all make me what I’m today and I wish like this year we all keep growing in our life and be together today tomorrow and year after.
This is how I had described myself in Year 2007:
This lad has different vision about life. Being different sometime you get accepted and sometime you don't. "Nothing is impossible if you desired to achieve it". Yeah ! I'm someone who is not scared of competition, as I believe "you do your best when you are in worst position." I have one weakness and that is being stick to truth. I believe in speaking truth then being you’re Fav's. may be you don't like me initially but more you know me the more you will start liking me . I know its not practical being blunt. But that's how I'm. Ethics are more important to me. I can't lie to myself so how come you expect me to lie to my love ones. Professionally! People call me that I'm on fast track i.e. achieving faster then my peers..! Yeah I have one target n i.e. being successful entrepreneur by age of 35. The main reason behind this is .. ...I hate being dominated.You can dominate me only through love. .. I m creative and love to explore new things, its possible only when I have my own setup. .. I think I have some responsibility toward society and people around me and to do something for them I need good resources. On Personal level I'm creative and kind sometime emotional too.. Being human I think these are the quality that makes us gentle and nice. Money is the last desire for me. as I never felt needy for it whether I have my wallet full or empty. I value and care relationship and consider its as possession of life. Being Moody sometime I get quite and silent. And the next thing I do is to pen down my emotion and that's what brings out my creativity. I think we have one life and so many things to follow. so I never restrict my fantasy and it turn me into adventurous and fun loving person. I love to do so many activities. Sometime you find me going for long drive, photography. Weekend Party...techno fest...writes reviews, Playing games, Working out participating in marathon or just spending my day with colony kids..! Life is full of actives adventure, creativity struggle and Fun...I don't mind born again as Kunal! July 22 And it change my lifewhen I know : Good things and bad things are part of life..!
From the time I have got conscious of understanding world; I keep working on myself and things around me to make it perfect for my happiness. Some times it works for me and mostly it won’t. I have always a feeling to make everything around me so perfect that I never loose the comfort from my life. When I say comfort it’s just not about luxury of car, ac, loads of pocket money but it include, comfort of good friends, family, and love once. On professional side it was good result success and praise from parents and teachers.
Today I decided to share the same with you all.
Problem to solution:
Restructuring:
Consistency:
Here are few key points I would like to share with you all that I have followed whenever I target something in my life. March 23 Life is story that we live everyday and remember till our last breathToday I was sitting and thinking about myself , my life , my decision, good and bad memories. Everything was passing by my eyes like story. Yeah We live a Life and I call it story. When I was kid I was found of listening stories. My mom read it for me from comics and books when her own stocks get over. Later when my demand turn into bargain and book start getting pile up in my home then dad decided to bring RAMAYANA ( from geeta press) It was huge book with 1500 pages but my carving for stories was even bigger then it so it also get over in 3-4 month time. Seeing my sporty sprit my dad decided to bring MAHABHARATA volume 1 and 2 (from geeta press)
each containing more then 1500 page.
The best part of the greed was me, turning into encyclopedia. At age of 6 years I was well educated of both epic stories along with Panch tantra and uncountable comics and nandan, champak and many more.which I don't remember now as the name faded with time from my memories.Later when I grown up everything looks around me like stories.
Yeah, Later I realized that with time I had developed a structured thinking style where everything happening around me look like a story to me. When I mark person as character and incident as turning point. While listening to others I had now started think about why thinks happen and what was the cause and effect. My friends who noticed me start calling me thoughtful person. But my interest was not to be called something rather to understand why something happen and what was the reasons behind the incident.
This self realization sometime turn into extreme obsession to understand logic and working of different things in life. With growth and experience I had started making my own perception about everything and developing logic behind my thoughts.This creation or write-up out come of similar thought where I felt that I should write about how I feel about different things in life and what make me think that Life itself is a story that ends with our last breath.
Before you read my logic and Funda and make your own opinion about me. I would like to warn you about few things.
Warning !!! before you read my logics/funda..!!
1. Never read any of the funda or logic partial or incomplete. Always finish them or read them when you are mentally prepare and free.
2. The logic and funda are not tested but the abstract thought process so never follow them blindly and later blame me.
3. All written facts are original and evolve from my life and experience, I don't mind if you use them and tell your friend that its your but if you do so please do left a token of thanks.
4. My write-up is my own view about life but there may be possibility that you will find it related to your present or past, so please avoid any depression and remember I'm giving you company so you are not the only chosen one.
5. Don't even thing to laugh on them in front of me I wrote them cause I felt so, if you think different then go ahead and write your own funda.
6. Never ask me about person, incident releated to funda as I'm don't feel comfortable talking about my personal life unless I want myself to share it with you.
7. I want you all to read it and evolve your own logic if you like something here ..
8. Life is important and no one is complete SIN if you spend little longer with that person you will find something good in him/her.
9. These logic are my own evolution so it can be changed or discarded anytime if I start thinking different so if you honestly like something make a safe copy as you may not find it again and then don't complain me.
10.These funda are my evolution so never assume me with them I'm far bigger then these thoughts and abstract fact. I carry multi -dimension ...!!
No more warning now pure funda..!!
WHY WE FAIL EVEN WHEN WE ARE PLANNED AND PREPARE FOR SOMTHING :
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To understand this logic we have to understand why something work as we want . Well it work because we do all those things that require to be done at right time and at right place. For example Water is form when we mix 2 carbon molecules with 1 oxygen molecule in standard lab condition. Where temperature and pressure where maintain as it should be required. Similarly our automobile never deliver as promised mileage by manufacturer as they claim that the test where done in standard condition. Similarly our life incidents are dependent on so many factor which are not govern by us and few are unseen and unpredictable.
Here are few simple examples :
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I work hard but I don't earn what I deserve , I study hard but I don't score good. We love each other but not sure about our future that what will happen. She/ He love me but don't know whether we settle or not.
Yeah these are day today buzz that heard from people around us. But we hardly think why all these situation arises in our life or someone's life when we are so much prepared and planned. Where things go wrong. What we had missed when executing things. Answer is simple, we missed nothing but the external force working in background were not favorable and supportive enough to support our cause. But you will say " oh I have check even thing that can effects us.so why I had failed in achieving what I had planned. Answer is you might have checked things which you can see around but there are lot of things which are not govern by you. Taking the above example "I study hard but I don't score good." Yeah you might have study hard but you were not the examiner or you were not who set question paper. May be your study plan was not in right directions.You can control only the factors which are in your hand rest is other's discretion, i.e. how they want it to happen.
I have always believe a full prove plan is where you are the only decision maker . If your plan involves 2 then the chance of success reduce to 50 % similarly when count goes to 3 then chances reduces to 33% . and so on.
How to counter this factor :
======================
Since we understand the issue now the very next step is to counter the factor. I think the best way to counter such issue is to have flexible approach towards life. I don't want you to be ignorant where you just live everything on faith. I want you to conscious and aware of the changes that are taking place around you and accordingly change your priority and goal. If you get rigid in your thought process then there is possibility of your breakdown and getting to depression and feeling to looser.
So keep multiple option open all the time even you are 100% sure of your success. You never know the unforeseen changes that can turn everything against you. I keep very simple approach .I simply ask myself what I want. Path can be changes and journey can be delayed or cancelled. Acceptance is the key. If something happen that you don't want , first thing you need to do is to accept it and then again plan for what you want this way you will be always aware of your limitation and will plan accordingly.
Mostly I found people who are not ready to accept their failure and by the time they realized its the already lost their battle. Best way to handle worst situation is to keep yourself calm , the valid reason for this is that the bad has already happen and you cannot deny it so better accept it and try again to achieve what you had not able to achieve in first go.In simple word giving yourself second chance.
Be scientific in your approach that is be calculative and see all sides of a box. Never assume better be ignorant cause assumption sometime lead to miss- calculation and we loose something for no good reasons. Give time to yourself and situation if you rush you may mess up things. And if you delayed because of casual approach then again things or goal skip from your hand and situation will be out of control. Never take things to personal. Remember good and bad that comes to you is situational and it is bound to change with time.
January 19 Not forever!There is one thing fixed about life and that is nothing is fixed in life. When you feel things are settling down and everything is in your favor, suddenly something happen and life become complete mess. We keep try to settle things in your favor, but life has different plans.
Things look worst when it related to emotional need. How brave you are and how much you know things well but when its about your emotional need you feel helpless. You loose all your wisdom and feel paralyzed. So what we do to get over such situation. You cannot be bold, as it not about career, money its about the most important part of your life. After all life has no meaning without love. Some one rightly said " Love is the sweetest way to hurts someone"-Ghanni (ma..younger bro think so..!)
I prefer to write it down when things didn't look great. Its like talking to yourself. Life is always good when you keep things light but it get complex the movement you start talking it seriously. There is no harm if everything is in your favor but things get worst when things didn't work out well. Sometime I think when we are wrong .Is it when we keep flirting or its when we are sincere.
My past experience had suggested me that I rule when ever I hardly bother for others but when I did I got hurt. The good soul sometime warn us that don't do something it may be not good. But casual brain say go for it . Its part of life.
Acceptance is the key. Life moves on. Being happy or being sad is just state of mind. Nothing in life can be so indispensable that you can't live without it. Yeah it true if he/ she was there may be life have been more beautiful. But life still can be more beautiful without them. So move on! January 15 Ek choti se love storyThis story is about a guy and a girl who meet on orkut, share their liking, find so many things in common and fall in love . It is as fractious as it sound but at same time as real as you can think off. Some time life gets more fascinating then any friction. We love thinking out of box. We know its not real but again we love it because we are in love. There is one good complex thing that is hard to ignore. That's when you both share too many things in common, some time it actually work against us. Like two magnet repulsive when you bring the same pole together.This is five days love story.Its started so fast and ended even faster then expected.Living some sad feeling in both heart. I still remember girl always keep insisting to guy to slow down his pace but their is saying is blind and it become furious when two hot get together.To getting started with the story. I have divide it according to days. Since it get started and get over by day 5.
Day 1:
Its was real boring weekend. I was sitting as usual on my laptop. Looking something exciting. After doing lots of research I opted orkut. Being an automobile lover usually I love to write reviews and help people with their technical and generic question regarding their car. But that day the activity was lesser than expected and hence I had opted to look something else. where I get more active people. I had decided to join my next best choice yeah it was social community gathering of Rajputs. When I had started looking around in the community I really didn't find a single post telling anything or into any serious discussion. Being active in taking initiatives I had decided to join the community and start some good threads. I had tried to loop in all who were moderating the community. I got tremendous support and response. Among everyone she was also there with least expected response.The day ended with hot discussion no personal interaction. I was more passionate about community promotion then anything else.
Day 2:
As per my plan the day two begins with load of creative work but no love. I was even thinking that time that something special going to happen in my life. Get loads of appreciation and from everyone in community. But then something happen was a repulsive scrap from her in my scrapbook. With true sprit I had put his point of view. But as expected there was no response from her end. Discussion get to it climax and finally everyone realizes the importance of so serious work that the community require to keep it essence . The thread ended and I started doing the good work. Suddenly I had got a witty scrap from her . That change everything yeah it turn out to be active discussion and that was the first formal interaction .
Day 3:
We start sharing. what we believe what we like think start working so well that it bring them magically close to each other. Relation and interaction was moving at fast pace.I was feeling like she is the chosen one whom god has specially design for him. I am born with nature of go getting and hence didn't believe in opportunity to come rather love to go and get hold of opportunity. I proposed her but her reaction was more confusing she wanted things to happen but at slow pace. Passion of love was so high that it make me feel nothing is that can keep both of us apart.
Day 4:
Girl came back saying that she didn't slept whole night and she is feeling like we are going at really high speed. I took it as positive feedback even though I was bothered about her sleep. Day 4 was the most complete day after long time. I was so happy that I found someone who is just perfect to be my better half. I was doing my all work at double pace unaware about the fact that it didn't going to last for long. There were two things working against this relationship. . My over enthusiasm and her being to precise in her communication. When we are in positive frame of mind we generally get blind and don't want to see around and that when we fall. Some thing similar was about to happen. Being famous and always in company of girls I started think that since now I have commitment I should better start working on the change to make the relation more stable. As I found her being quite simple and straight in her approach. To show my extent of love I changed my orkut status to committed from being single. This was bold step especially knowing the fact that the girl is not located local rather she is sitting 10000 miles away from you .
Day 5 : Judgment day
I got up little early , may be because I was greedy . I wanted to spend more time with her before she get to sleep. We started talking and suddenly she disappear from chat . That was first time realized that without her I m feeling incomplete . I was missing her like anything. I was feeling un-easy. Finally after about an hour I found her back online . I had told her everything that I felt in those few hours. Today she again warned me to slow down in my going . And she had started telling about her and her family. I had come to realized that the girl I was talking all these days, actually belong to US. Now things which were looking like possible started turning out impossible for me. I started feeling like loosing her and more then that I was disturbed that why she didn't discuss all this before. She asked me to check her profile and read about her . I read it again and then I realized that I fall for an NRI. Fearing the end of this dream relation that getting more in shape. I had started blaming her for all this , may be at back of my mind I had fear of loosing her was turning in to anger. She was confused as she was expecting me to know all these things. On the other hand all I was looking her and nothing else. Being in shocked for an hour by the time I had realized and tried to calm myself, she had already decided her mind to move on. I was feeling helpless as the only communication we were using all these 4-5 days was orkut and gtalk.
I had realized for the first time how important she become in my life and life was looking colorless and pale without her. But before my realization. she turn out to be more impulsive and deleted herself from my friend list and gmail account. My love was dieing and I was helpless in pain. I was in condition which I can't discuss with anyone.After all people were going to laugh on me saying " how can you fall for some one in 5 days and that's on orkut and gtalk. " But its me who knows what she means to me. This is my love story where I mate a wonderful girl I fall in love with her, she rocks my world and then I lose her .
What all I can call this incident then " Ek choti se love story ". After all we dream , we plan , we want but god always has something else in his mind. Alas ! If we continued this relation..! After all we all need one with whom we like to spent rest of our life. |
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